Hollywood Hills Fire 2007
Originally uploaded by PortugePunk.
Fire today in the Hollywood Hills on my side of the hills. I love this picture though. From the top of the Capitol Record’s rooftop.
Hollywood Hills Fire 2007
Leave a reply
Monthly Archives: March 2007
Memories of an Ex
I’m not one to give much thought to What Might Have Beens. I’ve never Googled any exes. Heck, I don’t even Google myself or my husband. Though he loves to Google his family and our two boys – have you any idea just how many Griffin dogs or Charlie cats there are out there?
Today, for some reason, out of the blue, my ex popped into my head and I can’t seem to shake him. Once I got home, I thought I’d give that ol’ friend, Google a whirl. Thing is, my ex has a fairly common name, so I wasn’t able to find anything. Not even a crumb. But I still can’t seem to shake him.
I know full well that we’d never have lasted. Not even counting the fact that he was a few years younger (not a big deal, I know), we were just two different kinds of people and in two different places in our lives. He was a hard worker, but he wasn’t college educated and didn’t really see the point. While I don’t think that college is for everyone (my hubby has no college education and is doing quite well surrounded by MBAs), it was still a huge part of who I was at the time. So much so that I went on to get my Masters.
Back when we were dating, I was just finishing up my teaching degree, hoping and praying to get a teaching job. My focus was entirely on getting that job. His focus was entirely on finding someone to settle down with and take care of. Me, I was in that I-don’t-need-anyone, I’m-an-independent-woman phase. I was ready to finally get started being an adult and living the life. Interestingly enough though, we were head over heels, blissfully enamored.
Or so I thought.
One of his co-workers broke up with her husband or boyfriend or baby daddy, or whatever and starting focusing all her attention on my guy. I knew this because he told me. She was an older woman (older than him, older than me) with a young child. He, as I stated earlier, just wanted to settle down and take care of someone. She, it turned out, was just that someone. He dumped me.
He went head on into a relationship with her and never bothered with me again. Well, until she broke up with him about 3 months or so later, that is. Then he came back to me. We went out to dinner and I said that we could try to be friends, but I just didn’t trust him. A week or two later, she wanted him back and back her went. This time, I walked away. For good. Until today.
T that time, I really wasn’t able to look to someone else as my hero or my savior. I just didn’t need that in my life. I didn’t need someone to “complete me.” I can see now how that might be annoying when you’re in a relationship. There’s needs to be some emotional give and take. I can honestly thank him for allowing our relationship to teach me that.
But I do wonder what made me think of him. Was it a song on the radio? Reflecting back over the last couple of weeks, I have heard a LOT of songs that could remind me of him – if I was in that frame of mind. Is it our long ago psychic connection? Is he thinking about me? Is he wondering what might have been?
I’ve got to tell you, I may have had a rough patch of life here or there, but I really, really like my life. I really like the person I’ve turned into. And I really like the friends that I consider my “family.” I really don’t have any thoughts of him, good, bad or ugly, but I do wish him well wherever he may be.
Weaknesses…
Have you ever really thought about that things that you compulsively purchase knowing full well that you don’t need? I like to tell myself that I’m practicing the fine art of plenty – meaning, there is no lack, and therefore I spend as part of attracting. You, give and take, ebb and flow, ying and yang. Well today was one of those days – Day 41 .
I like cookbooks and recipes. Thing is, I don’t like to cook using cookbooks. For some reason, I tend to do my cooking off of recipes that the ladies on my website post. I like to think that they’re more tried and true than a random recipe. Yet, I can’t seem to stop myself from buying cookbooks or cooking magazines. I recently signed up for both, Cooks Illustrated and Cooking Light (neither have started up yet). You see, I’m one of those rare breeds that sits down and reads a cookbook.
Today though, today I just have the overwhelming urge to pick up two of the special edition Best of Cooking Light magazine. And you better believe the first thing I did when I got home was sit down and read them both, cover to cover. I have to say though, they did have some very yummy sounding recipes in there that I’m fairly certain I’ll be making as I have decided that we need to eat at home more often.
In defense of my impulse shopping and how it all relates to my 100 Day Challenge and journey, I also picked up Abraham Hicks’ Law of Attraction. It was on my Christmas list this year, but I didn’t get it. So seeing it at Costco, I just had to have it, especially considering I finished their last book about a month ago now. Funny thing about Costco, they had The Secret DVD as well. Who knew? They always say that the teacher will come when the student is ready so good for Oprah and Costco for providing the message to new students.
And speaking of The Secret, I should be getting my copy of Rhonda Byrne’s book. My local bookstores were out of it and Amazon was on a month or so wait, so I picked it up from an independent bookseller on Amazon. Funny thing, it was every where I turned around in Austin – okay, three places, but you get the idea. A little aside here, did you know that Esther Hicks and Abraham were in the original Secret movie? If you haven’t checked out their teachings, I suggest you do. Good stuff and in small digestible chunks (just the way I prefer my spiritual brain food). 😉
Glorious Gratitude
It is officially my husband’s 45th birthday. We went out earlier this evening for a celebratory dinner (Ciudad in down town Los Angeles – very yummy) and then we settled down for a movie and a snuggle with the boys. Our cat, by the way turned 7 yesterday, so this has been a celebratory weekend all around, as I’m sure you can imagine.
While taking in all the love that my husband and my boys have to offer after enjoying our delicious meal (and more importantly, after balancing our business books – yeehaa!!) I started to realize that I’m grateful for so many things in my life. What a perfect thing to blog about since it’s been a while since I’ve publicly counted my blessings. Here goes…
* I am grateful for my husband. He can always make me laugh. He knows how to calm me down when I’m freaking out. And he loves me for the person that I am (tears and all when doing the bookkeeping) and doesn’t freak out and try to change me.
* I am grateful for my boys. They’ve both been incredibly snuggly this whole weekend. Charlie even offered to help me open the tuna for his birthday breakfast, he’s so sweet.
* I am grateful that our books balanced. Last year I went through a lot of tears and heartache, to say nothing of my time and energy to come even close to getting things to balance. This year, thanks to my hubby, we’re A-OK!
* I am grateful that we’ll be getting a bookkeeper so from this day forward I’ll never have to cry or get pissed over or angry over QuickBooks – never again.
* I am grateful for our home. While we’d love a bigger place of our own that doesn’t share walls with (what seems to be) a miserable, old woman that hates us, our home is still just perfect for where we are right now.
* I am grateful that we have the resources to eat out when we feel the need (maybe, possibly, a tad too much – LOL). Especially when we can go for the occasional splurge and not feel guilty and just enjoy our time and our food.
* I am grateful for Firefox and their (fairly) new spell check. Without it, folks would think I was the world’s worst speller and would doubt that I was ever really a 4th grade teacher.
* I am grateful that we’ve been having some beautiful weather. It may bring on allergy season, but it’s so nice out I just can’t help but love it.
* I am grateful for Weight Watchers and their program. I may not be doing as well as a couple of my friends (talk about impressive), but I’m losing weight and feeling great. And man, how much fun is it to be able to buy new clothes and fit into a smaller size!!! Oh yeah, I’m also grateful my arms finally stopped aching from that damn upper body workout I did the other day. Man that was tough.
* I am grateful for my friends. I know that I’d do anything for my friends and it’s great knowing that they’re there to support me through my good times and the not-quite-so-good times. Heck, they’d even help me bury a dead hooker in the desert – I know, I asked – LOL
* I am grateful for the ability to manifest an income. Once again, I turned around and was presented with an opportunity to earn $200 for doing 2 hours of my time doing market research. While it might not seem like much, it’s still money, and it’s still coming into my life freely and for that I’m grateful. Then again, I’m really, really grateful that I’ll be able to spend it on a little spa time *grin*
And lastly, I’m grateful, and so happy, for the wonderful, exciting opportunities and experiences that the Universe is bringing into my life.
Happy birthday to the most wonderful man in the World! I love you baby (and now even more people know!)
Effortless Perfection
As a means to get back my focus on life, I’ve started to actively get back on Weight Watchers. It’s not like I ever really went off, I just got sick and got busy, and well, just got lazy. I went back to my old eating habits and shunned the exercise. Tomorrow will be my first weigh in in about a month. Judging from the way my clothes have been fitting, I’m not expecting good news.
But, since I’m on the one in charge of my life, I’m the one that can decide to hold my head up high and get back on track. So far I’ve been successfully tracking what I’m eating (even if I’m not always making the best choices…damn that Chipotle!) and today I made sure to get in a good workout.
I honestly don’t know why I don’t embrace the whole workout thing more. Whenever I’ve finished my workout and I sit down to log my activity (and munch my apple) I always feel so good. You’d think that alone would be enough to spur me on – not counting how it helps to lose the inches. Hopefully, by writing just that, I’ll remember to use it as my motivation on those days when I just.don’t.fell.like.it (or so it would seem).
I also decided to give meditation another try. I was honestly looking for my food & exercise mediation CD to work on a little subtle reprograming, but I can’t seem to find it. Instead, I pulled out my Getting Into the Gap by Wayne Dyer. And again, I forgot how much I enjoy the whole meditation experience. My favorite part has to be the actual floating experience you feel when you are between the gap. Such a fascinating feeling. And like Dr. Dyer says, it’s basically just effortless perfection.
Focus Baby, Focus.
Wow, it’s day 34 of the 100 Day Challenge! Time has been flying by! I’ve met some really cool people while I was in Austin at South by Southwest. Who knew that an interactive/music/film festival would give me some of the very insight and focus I was craving.
I know I’ve mentioned last week how I kept hearing about the E-Myth and Michael Gerber (I love his story about how he found his calling). I’m really learning a lot and luckily, he has a great writing style that makes it read more like he’s talking to you than some business book.
While there I also met some other great folks such as Tim Ferriss (more about him later), Jenny Hart, Vickie Howell, two other really cool people that use the law of attraction to help attract your ideal client.
So yeah, things are really coming into focus…
* I am so happy and grateful now that our business is doing so well and earning $3000+ a month through multiple sources of revenue.
* I am so happy and grateful now that money comes to me in increasing quantities through multiple sources of on a continuous basis, for the good of all involved.
I Miss My Boys!
Wow, nearly two weeks away from my hubby is just too much. It’s just insane. I realized that while I was out of state and away from him, I missed him SO much. But once I got home, and was able to snuggle into bed with the boys, I really didn’t miss him so much. So I’m thinking, it’s really more about being away from home AND away from him.
The cool thing about this trip apart (I left for 5 days, then we met up in Austin for one night, then he came home 4 days later) was how often we were able to talk this time around. Usually, when he goes to Austin, he’s so busy going from show to show that we barely even talk. I’m fine with that, but really, this time around, it was nice to be able to talk from time to time.
But let’s just say…it’s so sweet when he comes home and we can all snuggle together. All the more reason to affirm that I am SO happy and grateful now that I’m in a loving, caring, affectionate, sex-filled, relationship!!
Live from SXSW Interactive!
It’s day 27 in my 100 Day Challenge and I’m currently hanging out in Austin at the South by South West Interactive Conference. And while this has nothing in particularly to do directly with the Challenge itself, I’m learning SO much and really receiving a ton of good information that I’m certain is a direct result of the energy I’ve been putting out. And the best part, since I seem to have left my power cord at my friend’s house in Dallas, I’m forced to conserve my computer time and focus on the actual people and events, going with the flow instead of hanging out in my own head.
Quick parting words…I got the message at least twice to check out The E Myth by Michael H. Gerber that I actually drove out to the local bookstore on my lunch break to pick it up (and score some YUMMY Amy’s Mexican Vanilla ice cream!). It’s really shaping up to be EXACTLY the sort of book I needed to help me to clarify my business success goals. So talk about needing to be open to what messages the Universe sends your way.
And now, I have a party (with a free drink or two!) to get too. I’ll post more after I either get back to Dallas or get back to LA.
100 Day Challenge – Day 21
I received the most interesting phone call the other day. Out of the blue I received a phone call about a job. Now that might not seem like a big deal, but I haven’t worked out of the home (not on my website, that is) for just over two years.
I haven’t even been looking for work for nearly two years now. I still have no idea how she found me, or even why she thought to give me a call (considering the caller herself said that I was over-qualified).
Since one of my focuses during this challenge right now is to bring in additional income from multiple sources and since I’m open to whatever the Universe might provide, I’m not the least bit surprised. In particular, I’m considering leaning towards doing some non-profit sort of work.
So again, I’m just loving this challenge and all the many things that are showing up in my life. Too cool!
* I am so happy and grateful now that our business is doing so well and earning $3000+ a month through multiple sources of revenue.
* I am so happy and grateful now that money comes to me in increasing quantities through multiple sources on a continuous basis, for the good of all involved.
100 Day Challenge – Day 18
A Couple of Observations…
One – Everyone is going absolutely C.R.A.Z.Y. for The Secret!!! I tried to order a copy of the book off of Amazon last week and it had about a 2 week or so delay. I didn’t feel like waiting, so I canceled my order. Then today, I stopped by B&N to pick up a copy (and my next book club book – Lolly Winston’s Happiness Sold Separately, which they were sold out of!) and they were sold out! The woman said the publishers just can’t seem to publish enough for the demand. Man, that Oprah is amazing…what she can do for book and product sales!
Two – One of the biggest changes I’m noticing since participating in the 100 Day Challenge (aside from the money just showing up!!) is that I’ve become a lot more mellow. I’m noticing others getting upset and frustrated in lines, or in traffic, or whatnot. But me, I’m cool as a cucumber with no worries. And let me just say, I’m SO loving that. Talk about things to be grateful for!
Three – I also seem to be purging a lot of crap. In a good way. I wrote earlier about what appeared to be a little breakdown of sorts with plenty of tears and pent up frustrations getting cleared. This was great because it really seemed to give me some much needed clarity and it brought the hubby and I closer. But now I seem to be dealing with a sinus-turned-bronchitis sort of thing. I’d let it work it’s way out, but I’ll be flying in a few days and after having flown with some sinus congestion a month or so ago, there’s just NO WAY in hell, I’m going through that again. But I do recognize that it’s just my body’s way of purging some crap. So I can be more than grateful for this cleansing experience – and I’m more than open to medication & healing 😉